Thursday, November 3, 2011

Football 101

So, I promised you a post about my football knowledge or let's be real here...lack there of.

Actually, I have come along way from the time when I thought the yellow lines were really on the football field. Which, in all reality, it should be. It would make life a lot easier.

I am surrounded by girls who know WAY to much about football. I mean, they make me listen to sports radio when driving to and from the football games.  God only knows what those guys on the radio are talking about. They talk way to fast, and go from one football team to another, I just can't seem to follow. I owe most of my football knowledge to Miss Football (how do you think she got her name) and Bestie. These girls know more about football than most guys.

In fact, this last weekend one of our guy friends told Miss Football that he was very impressed with her knowledge of the sport. Kudos to her, I would love to be the girl who knows what a touch back is and just how this freakin BCS thing works.

That is something I will never understand. BCS. Now, ask me about the latest on Kim Kardashin or any housewife and I can spit off facts left and right.

BCS standings, I am not your girl.

And who the heck is Kirk Herbstreit...all I know is that I don't like him very much, because he doesn't like my cowboys.

Word to the wise, if you like my OSU Cowboys...I like you : )

What I do know is this. Jesse Palmer, was put on ESPN for girls like me. FOR REAL. I will watch that sports center show ALL DAY LONG if he is on he even on it? Not sure really, I just see him sometimes talking about football games and I tune in. That boy is HOTT!!

 Whatever he is selling...I.Am.Buying!!

Don't get me wrong, I do know some things about football. I know that there are three "teams" to football...offense, defense, and special teams. Offense is my favorite, clearly I like it when we have the ball, it just makes me nervous when the other team has the ball. However...I do like it when our defense sacks the hell out of the other teams quarterback. That I like. I mean, I love a good tackle...who doesn't, right??

I played flag football once in college, got kicked out because of tackling.

Just a little FYI for ya.

I know you have four downs to try and move the ball 10 yards to the goal line and if we don't move 10 yards with thin those 4 tries, we have to give the ball to the other team or use the 4th down to punt the ball to the other team.

Even though I know all of that, I still make comments like this....
Saturday during the OSU vs. Baylor game, Miss Football and Bestie left right before half time for a few minutes. When they got back, of course they asked me what happened. This is how it went down.

Miss Football: Did I miss anything?
Me: Ya, you see Baylor had the ball, but then something happened and they left the ball there. Then they brought out like these measuring sticks and measured to see where the ball actually landed.
Miss Football: You mean they brought out the chains to measure if they got a first down or not.
Me: Yes, that is what I said...once again, this is exactly the reason why we need to have that yellow line on the field.

You see why a yellow line would be beneficial here??
Oh and the ref's at the game. Wouldn't you think that the letters R and L on the back of the ref's shirt stand for Right and Left?

I did...and apparently they do not. Which makes no sense if you ask me. R stands for Referee and L stand for line judge.

How was I supposed to know this?

Impressive how much I know about football, no?

With this being said, I really would like to know more about football. I really enjoy watching it and I want to know more about what is going on during the game.

 Since Christmas is right around the corner,dear football friends of mine...I hear there are some great football books out there...

Gaga for Gridiron - The Ultimate Guide to Football for Women

Tackling Football: A Woman's Guide to Understanding the College Game

Just saying...if you want me to be able to answer what happened when y'all leave the game...this might be beneficial.

Or you will get answers that probably involve that yellow line.

And although I may not know all there is to know about the actual game of Football...I do obey the Football commandments...brought to you by Southern Living.

. 1.Thou shalt wear team colors. But think twice before adorning yourself with body paint—you don’t want to be the Internet photo that goes viral.

2. Thou shalt know—and sing—your team’s fight song from beginning to end. Sure, you can “watermelon watermelon” your way through the Alma mater, but not memorizing the fight song is a fan failure.

3. Thou shalt keep your language clean (unless, of course, the quarterback fumbles on fourth and goal).
4. Thou shalt support the coach. Even when his calls are questionable.

5. Thou shalt be respectful to visiting teams. Remember: Southern ladies and gentlemen never boo.

6. Thou shalt set up a tailgate no fewer than three hours before kickoff (six if it’s a night game). Table linens and matching huggers encouraged, but not required.

7. Thou shalt theme your tailgate food around the visiting rival. Gator bites, anyone?

8. Thou shalt stay through the fourth quarter—rain or shine. That’s what ponchos are for, y’all.

9. Thou shalt respect the solemnity of Game Day by planning weddings, births, and other life events around the football schedule.

10. Thou shalt not covet other teams’ bowl games, national championships, or Heisman Trophy wins. There’s always next year.

And that's Football 101, blonde Oklahoma girl style.



Anonymous said...

Okay I have to admit I enjoyed your thoughts of football commandments. Also, I must say I do not follow them very well. Even though I am a die hard college football girl I do a poor job at your commandments. I can however through stats at you all day. Stat 1 for today OSU is number 3 in the BCS baby! If or should I say when we win this Saturday we will move up to number 2 in the BCS baby!


Anonymous said...

Two thumbs up, my friend. A very nice football blog. The commandments are clever. And those can be respected even by those of us who passionately support the yellow line being a part of real-and-in-person game viewing.

Go Pokes!


Tiffany said...

Love it. Love love love. It makes me proud when you say things like "sack the hell out of the other team's quarter back." GO POKES!

~Miss Football

Asha said...

Cute football commandments :) I wish I knew more about the sport too, but my hubs gets frustrated when I ask a million questions, haha! I love your blog anf am your newest follower! I hope you'll follow me back at

Rach said...

This made me bust up laughing. I love watching football from the stands but I have a hard time sitting still while it's on tv. And I'm pretty clueless about the teams and players. Hence chatting with Aaron Rodgers in a bar and having no idea who he was. Oopsie.

mandell said...

Isn't football so fun? I have four brothers so not understanding the game was not an option. I was the only 5 year old who knew her 7s times tables from weekends full of adding up TDs! Ha!

I am a proud Red Raider but am pulling for the Cowboys this season! (except next weekend)

I'm also your newest follower (and new blogger!) You can follow me at